Mentoring Through Influence, Not Authority

Mentoring is about empowering others to step up, contribute, and grow. How you encourage your mentee to participate, take initiative, and lead sets the tone for a collaborative, resilient team. You can think of yourself as a partner in their growth: your support helps your mentee see that leadership is about action and influence, not just about job titles.

Here’s how to help your mentee lead through influence:

• Invite your mentee into team discussions and design reviews. Instead of just assigning tasks, invite them into the discussion about the features they are implementing. This shows you value their input and want them to see the bigger picture.
• Encourage them to ask questions and share ideas. Remind them: “Fresh perspectives help us avoid blind spots. Don’t hesitate to speak up and remember that your ideas matter.”

A practical way to help your mentee build leadership skills is to use the “Lead by Example” cycle:

• Model: Demonstrate the behavior you want to see. For example, show how you take initiative or invite input from others.
• Invite: Encourage your mentee to try it themselves. “Would you like to propose your idea at the next meeting? I think the team would benefit from hearing your perspective.”
• Reflect: Afterward, debrief together. “How did it feel to share your idea? What went well? What would you do differently next time?”
• Repeat: Keep practicing this cycle to build confidence and skill over time.

Using this cycle helps your mentee see leadership in action, try it out in a safe environment, and continuously improve.

Leadership is about moving the team forward. Coach your mentee to lead in all directions: influencing managers (leading up), collaborating with peers (leading across), and supporting their team. You don't need a formal title to be a leader in a team.

Here are some ways to encourage this:

• If your mentee spots a gap, prompt them: “If you notice something missing, it’s okay to propose a solution or start the conversation. Leadership is about helping, not waiting for permission.”
• Share your own stories of influencing a project or decision without being the official lead. This helps your mentee see that anyone can make a difference.

• Natalie: Hey Milo, I noticed in the last sprint planning that we kept running into confusion about who owns which tasks. I’m not the scrum master, but do you think it would help if I put together a shared doc for everyone to track their assignments?
• Milo: That’s a great idea, Natalie! You don’t need a title to help the team stay organized. Taking the initiative like that is exactly how you build trust and influence.
• Natalie: Thanks! I just want to make sure everyone’s on the same page. Should I bring it up in the next standup?
• Milo: Absolutely. Mention it to the team and see if anyone has suggestions. This is a perfect example of leading by helping the group move forward.

Notice how Natalie identifies a need and proposes a solution, even without formal authority. Milo reinforces her initiative and encourages her to share her idea, showing that influence is about action and support.

Empowering your mentee to take initiative is one of the most valuable things you can do. Let them know their voice matters, and that even small actions can shape the team.

Consider the table below and some prompts to say when the situation arises:

By supporting your mentee in these ways, you help them build confidence, develop their own leadership style, and contribute meaningfully.

Coming up, you’ll get to practice these skills in a real-world scenarios, where you’ll guide your mentee to step up, share ideas, and lead through influence.