Here's a leadership truth that might surprise you: not all conflict is bad. In fact, some conflict is essential for high-performing teams.
The key is knowing which type of conflict you're witnessing - and which one to encourage versus shut down immediately.
Engagement Message
When you hear team members disagreeing, what's your first instinct?
There are two fundamentally different types of conflict: Task Conflict and Relationship Conflict.
Task conflict focuses on ideas, approaches, and decisions. "I think we should launch in Q2, not Q1 because customers aren't ready."
Engagement Message
This is productive disagreement about the work itself. Sound familiar?
Relationship conflict is personal. It attacks character, competence, or motives. "You always push unrealistic timelines because you don't understand our customers."
Engagement Message
Same disagreement, but now it's about the person, not the idea. Feel the difference?
Task conflict is actually healthy for teams. When people challenge ideas respectfully, you get better decisions, more creative solutions, and stronger buy-in.
Remember the Storming stage? Teams need to work through different perspectives to reach Norming and Performing.
Engagement Message
Have you seen teams make better decisions after healthy debate?
Relationship conflict, however, is toxic. It destroys trust, creates lasting resentment, and makes people avoid future collaboration.
People stop sharing ideas because they fear personal attacks. The team becomes guarded and performance suffers dramatically.
Engagement Message
Ever notice how one personal attack can poison team dynamics?
